


The Tree Fell Far from the Apple

by theteacuptempest



Category: GoodFellas (1990)
Genre: Child's POV, Coming of Age, Family Issues, Gen, Present Tense, Ruth-Centric, Sisterly bond - Freeform, Yuletide Treat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-16
Updated: 2016-12-16
Packaged: 2018-09-08 22:05:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,857
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8865088
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theteacuptempest/pseuds/theteacuptempest
Summary: "She writes that she’s going to be an actress. She writes that she’s going to own a mansion, but she’s going to build it in the same neighborhood Mom lives in or maybe in Uncle Jimmy’s. She writes that she has to stick close by, because she can’t leave her family and if she’s going to have a bunch of babies with Shaun Cassidy, she’s got to have Mom nearby to help raise them. She writes that her life is going to be perfect."Ruth Hill before the arrest and Ruth Hill after.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Who Shot AR (akerwis)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/akerwis/gifts).



> I hope this story is something you'll enjoy because you're definitely someone deserving of only good things. Happy Holidays and I hope you've had a lovely Yuletide.

The assignment is to write about the future. Ms. Leighton has a nice smile, she sighs a lot like she’s daydreaming, and she always wants to talk about the future. Ms. Leighton thinks the future is this shiny, perfect thing that’s always bigger and brighter than the now. She talks about it in a way that Ruth adores.

Ms. Leighton passes out the assignment early one morning, right at the start of the new term. She asks them to write about where they’ll be in ten years; about their jobs and their families. She writes her own version of the future up on the board, all flowery language and metaphors that sound like the records Grandma likes to play when they stay over at her house. By the time she finally lets the class start on their own papers, Ruth is squirming in her chair with ideas.

She writes that she’s going to be an actress and make even better movies than Walt Disney could handle. She writes that she’s going to own a mansion, but she’s going to build it in the same neighborhood Mom lives in or maybe in Uncle Jimmy’s. She writes that she has to stick close by, because she can’t leave her family and if she’s going to have a bunch of babies with Shaun Cassidy, she’s got to have Mom nearby to help raise them. She writes that she’s still going to be best friends with Melissa Jones and going to have a pool in her backyard. She writes that her life is going to be perfect.

She signs her name, _Ruth Hill_ , in such big letters at the top that she’s crossing over her first lines. She smiles when she turns it in and then runs off for recess with a giggling Melissa to get the good spot on the swings before that annoying Helen Stump can steal it.

-

Mom and Daddy fight, that’s just a fact. All parents do, she knows that because Janice Grey always says so and she’s a year older than even Judy so she ought to know. Besides, all her cousins’ parents fight and so do all the parents of the kids Mom takes her over to play with sometimes.  It’s not really something that bothers her.

Sometimes she thinks it bothers Judy.

Judy told her once about the time Mom had taken them somewhere and started yelling at somebody through an intercom. Ruth’s not really sure why it matters, because Judy’s not that much older than her and she doesn’t remember all the details. But Judy says there was a lot of screaming that night, even worse than usual. And still, Ruth’s not really sure why it matters except that Judy says it was really close to when Daddy disappeared to prison for a long time. Except that’s before Judy says things got bad. Sometimes when Daddy leaves real suddenly or comes back looking all rumpled and it makes Mom mad, Judy likes to talk in that _I told you so_ voice Ruth hates. Judy says that this fighting is going to be just as bad.

It is stupid really. Because Judy is really not that much older, even if she always tries to act like it.  Ruth’s pretty sure Mom and Daddy fought just as much before that and whenever they fight now it never lasts all that long anyway so it couldn’t be as bad as whatever Judy’s thinking. At least they never fight like James Cooper’s parents do. He sits three seats behind her in homeroom and cries about how mean his dad is every recess.  Ruth never cries about her parents, not even a little, and she never plans to start.

-

Going to Uncle Paulie’s is always the best. The food’s always a lot better there even if she’s learned to never say so to Mom.  She likes that there’s always so much that she never has to worry about getting her vegetables or someone putting something she hates on her plate. Uncle Paulie always serves a feast; she can load up on three different kinds of pasta and not one person would say anything about how she won’t touch the spinach with a three-foot pole.

But that’s the icing on the cake, the best-best part of dinner at Uncle Paulie’s is getting to see everyone. It isn’t like she doesn’t see everybody all the time, because she does. She has so many cousins that birthday parties happen nearly every weekend and a lot of nights they go over to Mrs. Moretti’s house, or Mrs. Gallo’s, or Uncle Jimmy comes over. They are always together, really. But going to Uncle Paulie’s for dinner is special.

Everyone gets dressed up. Everyone acts excited. But the big thing is that no matter how many people are around, Uncle Paulie always gives her special attention.

“You got taller, didn’t you?” Uncle Paulie asks when she makes her way over to him from the line of aunts, uncles, and older cousins that all want a kiss or hug.

“You saw me last week,” she says, but stands up straighter and a little bit on her toes when he pulls her into a hug.

Uncle Paulie pats her twice on the head, shoos her one-handed toward the dining room. “Definitely taller. You’re going to outgrow your sister.”

It’s a lie, because Grandma says Judy’s due for a growth spurt, but Ruth laughs all the same.  Judy finally untangles from an overzealous aunt and makes her way over. Uncle Paulie hugs her too.

“You girls are going to be just as pretty as your mother,” says his wife as she walks through the room. “The apples didn’t fall from the tree, as they say.”

Judy smiles in that pleasant way that’s required around adults and leads them both away to where the other kids are gathering around the little table. Judy gets wrapped up in gossip with Charlotte Moretti and Petey Jr. starts a card game that keeps Ruth busy until the women start to bring out the bread. They all settle down for helpings of pasta and meatballs, the conversation calming into gentle laughter and murmurs.

She gets up from the table early to ask Mom if she can go out back to play and after a little grumbling, Mom relents. A bunch of her cousins start a game of cops and robbers with the water guns the boys brought. Ruth wins by hiding under a bush until only Petey Jr.’s standing and then hitting him from behind. The boys argue that it’s cheating and her Mom gets mad she got dirt on her nice dress, but Uncle Paulie saw the end of the game. He’s says she won and tells Mom her dress is fine. Everyone knows better than to argue with Uncle Paulie, even Mom.

Ruth grins the whole way home.

-

Judy likes to pretend she’s too old for a babysitter. Judy thinks she too old for everything, so Ruth doesn’t think it’s about Lois specifically. It’s fine; Lois doesn’t pay too much attention to Judy. Or to Ruth, for that matter.

Which is awesome, in Ruth’s opinion, and exactly why she’d rather have Lois as the babysitter than be watched by Grandma or Uncle Michael.

Lois spends a lot of the time she’s supposed to be watching them on the phone or staring at the TV. Which means Ruth and Judy can do just about whatever they want as long as they don’t leave the house. It also means Ruth gets to stay up and watch whatever Lois puts on the TV. If Mom and Dad are out at the club, that means staying up late enough for Chiller even though Mom says she’s not allowed to watch anything scary before bed.

Judy always rolls her eyes and goes up to her room, playing her records loud and writing in the diary she swears she’ll kill Ruth over if Ruth ever touches. Ruth likes staying in the living room with Lois, who has a strange, drawn out laugh and always puts extra salt on the popcorn. Lois doesn’t make fun of her when she hides behind her stuffed elephant, the one Uncle Paulie gave her three birthdays ago, at all the scary parts. Not the way Judy does. 

So Judy can say she’s too old for a babysitter all she wants, Ruth doesn’t mind being a kid for a little while longer.

-

Sometimes Judy stops acting like she’s all grown up long enough to play with Ruth.

It used to happen all the time. Judy used to play any game Ruth suggested and didn’t laugh at Ruth’s dolls and didn’t care about boys or makeup. Grandma says that this is a problem with teenagers. Judy’s growing up; she’s got bigger things on her mind and Ruth will too, when she’s Judy’s age. Ruth doesn’t think she’ll ever care that much about boys. Sure she plans to marry one of the Hardy Boys, but that’s about as far as her interests go. At least Shaun can solve mysteries. Ruth has no idea what Judy sees in dumb old Eddie, who’s only skill is throwing a ball around a court.

The important thing is that sometimes Judy stops caring about dumb teenage stuff and starts acting like her old self. Today is one of those days. She woke Ruth up late and smiled a lot during lunch, and now parades right into Ruth’s room wanting to play dress up.

“We’re famous singers,” Judy says, setting the stage for the game. She’s got all her drugstore makeup sitting on Ruth’s vanity. It’s just some powder and a couple tubes of lip balm, but it looks nice strewn out like that. “We’re going to a big show.”

“We got to look nice for it,” Ruth says back, smiling at her sister’s reflection in the mirror.

“Mmmmhmmm.” Judy makes her sit down and starts pulling up Ruth’s hair. It’s a complicated sort of style and Ruth can tell it will end up lopsided, but Judy looks like she’s having fun.

Ruth doesn’t care much about dress up. Dolls are more fun to make over and she hates the feel of pressed powder on her skin. But it was always Judy’s favorite game. Ruth can suck it up until Judy gets bored and starts talking about how much older she is again.

“I need more bobby pins,” Judy mutters, tugging at Ruth’s hair like she could make it stay in place out of sheer will.

“Mom’s got some,” Ruth says, wanting to prolong the game.

They stumble out into the hallway and Judy goes into their parent’s room. Ruth stands outside the door, watching to make sure Mom doesn’t come through and yell at them for going through her stuff. Ruth keeps having to hold her hand over her mouth to stop from laughing and giving them away.

“There’s none on the dresser,” Judy calls back, voice a mock whisper. Judy’s giggling too, but she’s a lot quieter about it.

“Try the drawers,” Ruth suggests. She sticks everything into her own. It keeps Mom from calling her room a mess and she figures that maybe parents do the same thing.

A drawer opens and shuts, Judy makes a gagging noise. “Underwear,” she says. “Ew.”

Another drawer opens and shuts. “Just clothes,” Judy says.

“Maybe we could take something of Mom’s to wear,” Ruth says, staring down the length of the hall.

“No way,” Judy says with a snort. Another drawer opens with a scrapping sound. “Mom would totally have us ha-”

“Judy?” Ruth turns her attention from playing look out to staring at her sister’s back. She can’t see much from out in the hall, but when she starts to move into the room Judy throws out an arm.

“Don’t,” Judy says and her tone is so firm that Ruth forgets to be mad that she’s trying to be the authority.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.” The drawer slams shut. Mom has to have heard that but Judy just walks out of the room slow as molasses. She’s got a funny look on her face, the same kind of look as when they’re waiting on someone to pick them up from school and Judy’s trying to pretend to be cool in front of the eight grade boys.

“What was it?” Ruth whines and she thinks it’s a pretty good cover for how wrong that look makes her feel.

“Nothing.” Judy grabs Ruth by the arm and takes her back to her room. “This was dumb anyway. Let’s get those pins out of your hair and we can play with your dolls okay?”

Ruth thinks she ought to object. Clearly something’s wrong. But instead she starts digging through her hair, wincing when she tries to loosen a pin. “Can we play with your old Malibu Barbie?”

Judy hates letting Ruth touch her old toys. She gives Ruth a tiny smile anyway. “Sure. But just this once okay?”

Judy’s weird the rest of the week. She even forgets the Barbie in Ruth’s room and doesn’t even get mad when she finds in under Ruth’s bed two days later. She never tells Ruth what bothered her about that drawer. Ruth never goes to look for herself.

-

“Uncle Michael!” Ruth makes sure to get ahead of Judy on the way through the house and flops into a chair next to him in the kitchen. They don’t get to see their uncle as much as she wants and she’s not going to let Judy beat her out of a place next to him at dinner.

Her enthusiasm is maybe a little unwarranted, she can admit that. Uncle Michael’s been around all day, helping with dinner and Ruth with her math homework. But it’s been a good day. Daddy’s acting funny but he’s always acting funny nowadays, and everything else is going great. Melissa called earlier about a sleepover she wants to have next week and Mom already said she could go. Judy spent most of the afternoon actually paying attention to Ruth, braiding and unbraiding her hair while complaining about that Eddie boy she likes from the basketball team. Judy is in such a good mood she even told Ruth that she could borrow a little colored lip balm for school Monday.

It’s been a good day and having Uncle Michael over is just the cherry on top.

“Squirt,” he calls her and ruffles her hair. He puts a big helping on her plate and folds her napkin on her lap. He pinches her after and Ruth elbows him, starting a sharp bones war throughout dinner.

Judy gets in trouble for feeding the dog of the table, even though Ruth and Uncle Michael have been doing it all afternoon. That just makes Ruth grin wider, and Uncle Michael barely looks like he really disapproves when he chides her for laughing at her sister. No one makes her help clean up and after the table’s cleared, Uncle Michael sits her and Judy down for a game of Monopoly that last until Mom makes her go to bed.

It’s a really good day and she falls asleep curled around her stuffed elephant, still smiling.

-

She wakes up and there’s shouting. That’s not unusual. Mom and Daddy fight a lot, after all. Daddy’s been weird lately, and when he gets that weird he and Mom fight. It’s normal.

The sirens are not.

She wakes up and goes to the window. Red and blue lights shine through the glass and when she peeks down into the yard, police are everywhere. Somebody’s banging on the front door. Ruth can hear them from even her room.

Ruth can hear Mom too. She’s making screechy noises and tearing around the house.  When Ruth takes a peek through the crack in her bedroom door, Mom is running from the bathroom to the master bedroom like there’s fire on her heels. It strikes Ruth as being very strange as much as it scares her. Mom never gets upset when the police show up. Ruth didn’t think it was something they were supposed to panic about anymore.

After a few minutes, Judy slips out of her room and pushes right into Ruth’s. Judy’s wearing her nice jacket instead of a house coat and a pair of old sneakers. She looks pale and scared. Ruth holds on tight to her stuffed elephant, then drops it and reaches out for Judy’s hand instead. Judy lets her and even squeezes back.

The police burst in a little while later. It’s another explosion of noise, one that makes Ruth jump and Judy let out a strangled, crying sort of sound. Ruth swears it sounds louder than thunder when the men stomp around the house. She can hear things breaking, drawers being slammed, and people yelling. Mom’s yelling the loudest.

They come into her room after a long, scary stretch of minutes. Judy’s grip becomes so suddenly tight that Ruth yelps. They both back up into the wall when the policeman says to, watch him tear apart her room and shout things at each other.

Ruth watches it all with a certain kind of numbness. She’s scared, but she’s also worried that they did the same thing to Judy’s room. They might have broken something and Judy’s going to be awful to live with until she gets over it. She might be so mad she doesn’t let Ruth borrow her lip balm. They might have even broken the lip balm.

Ruth stays very calm thinking about that, even though she’s scared. She stays calm right up until one of the policemen picks up her stuffed elephant wrong and it tears. She listens to the ripping sound and watches the ear come away in bits of string. The policeman just tosses it down on the ground again and ignores it.

If Judy’s grip wasn’t so bone bruising tight, Ruth may have jumped the policeman right then. Instead she just sort of jerks in Judy’s hold, giving up as quick as she meets resistance. Then she starts to cry.

It comes over her in a big rush, that she’s scared and nothing else but scared. She doesn’t care if they trash Judy’s room or if she ever gets that lip balm. She just wants these people gone and for Mom to stop screaming and for the noise to stop. A policeman leads Judy down into the living room and Judy leads Ruth since she can’t stop crying long enough to see where she’s going.

Mom’s there and she says something Ruth can’t make out. She reaches for Ruth, but Judy’s hold is so very tight and Ruth doesn’t want to move away. Mom draws back and they all wait for the police to leave. Judy only asks Mom one thing, if it’s Daddy’s fault. After that she doesn’t say anything else, just rubs Ruth’s back and glares at everyone that moves.

Mom doesn’t have to say that Daddy did something. The way the policeman snorts when Judy asks says all they need to know.

-

Daddy comes home but she hears Mom on the phone with Grandma saying that a trial is coming anyway. She uses a lot of words that Ruth only ever hears from late night cop shows. Mom cries a lot. Daddy spends a lot of time on the couch.

Mom and Daddy’s fighting gets worse, then suddenly stops altogether. Ruth thinks the silence is worse than any fighting James Cooper’s parents could ever do. Mom won’t even look at Daddy most days, and Judy won’t talk to either of them no matter how much Mom tries.

They only go to school once after _it_ happens. Mom lets them stay home for days on end but eventually Grandpa comes over and drops them off in front of the school yard. Judy says that the police invading their house was the worst day of their lives, no contest, no how. But privately Ruth thinks going back to school for the one awful day is the real worst.

Even with all the bad that came that night of Daddy being arrested, it had all happened at home. Mom was still there and so was Uncle Michael. Grandma and Grandpa came over. When Ruth wanted to cry that night, she didn’t have to walk far to find someone to whine to. She didn’t have to go far to find someone to let her sit in their lap and snot all over their shoulder. The only person she has at school was Judy and their classes aren’t even in the same part of the building.

But they go anyway. Judy runs ahead of her in the parking lot to her to her class and Ruth has to walk alone.

The day is awful. Helen Stump’s aunt lives on their block and she’s already told the whole room about the police taking Daddy. Everyone whispers when she enters the room, getting louder when she sits down and even Melissa won’t talk to her. Ruth can’t help but feel a particular kind of betrayed. Melissa is her best friend; they have the necklaces to prove it. She was going to be Ruth’s maid of honor one day. But at lunch, Melissa tells her that her parents said she couldn’t talk to Ruth anymore and sits with Helen instead.

Ruth sits by herself and pretends she doesn’t hear what the people around her are saying. It turns out that fifth graders still don’t know how to whisper right. Or maybe everyone just doesn’t care if she hears them call her family names. She gives up half way through her sandwich and goes to sit in a bathroom stall until the bell rings.

When she waits in the parking lot for Grandpa to pick them up again, Judy marches right up to her and takes her hand. Ruth pretends she doesn’t notice how Judy’s got a busted lip and Judy pretends she doesn’t see how red Ruth’s eyes are. Grandpa pretends he doesn’t notice anything at all, just chatters away on the drive back like it’s just an ordinary Tuesday.

Even Ruth’s not surprised that nobody comes the next day to make them go back.

-

Mom swears that this isn’t like before.

“He’s not going back to jail,” she says, petting Ruth’s hair in shaky, swift motions.

Ruth, Judy and Mom all sit together on the couch. She doesn’t know where Daddy is, but she can hear Uncle Michael in the kitchen. She’d rather be with him, see if he would give her some of the cookies she knows Mom stashed in the high cabinet. Everyone’s been letting her have sweets whenever she wants, now that everything’s went sideways.

“The police came,” Judy argues. She’s got her arms crossed over her chest and she’s siting as far away from Mom as the couch will allow. It’s the first time Ruth’s heard Judy speak to Mom in a week. “He’s in trouble. Jail’s always were these things end up.”

Judy always acts like she knows everything. Sometimes it gets on Ruth’s nerves. Right now it just feels like she’s right. Judy might not be that much older, but she is older. She remembers a lot more about when Daddy had to leave the first time than Ruth does.

“We worked things out with the police. These things don’t always have to turn to jail, you know.” Mom’s still petting her hair, nails getting a little tangled from the hairspray. “We worked things out so that we can all stay together and your Dad gets to stay with you girls.”

“And what’s that?” Judy asks. She would have never gotten away with that tone before but doesn’t even frown.

“We’re going to move.”

Judy narrows her eyes, but Ruth thinks that sounds okay. They’ve moved before. Maybe this time they’ll end up in Uncle Jimmy’s neighborhood or someplace closer to Grandma and Grandpa.

“Move where?” Judy’s voice gets all high and annoyed, like she knows something more than Mom’s telling.

Mom makes a nervous kind of sound deep in her throat. “Someplace away from here. Far away from those nasty cops trying to hurt your Dad.”

“Someplace? Where’s someplace?” Judy’s starting to sound mad and Ruth’s starting to feel scared again.

“We don’t know yet, baby. Just someplace far away. Another state maybe.”

Ruth shakes her head, earning a sharp tug when she pulls a knot against Mom’s still stroking hands. She speaks up for the first time since Mom called them down from their rooms. “We can’t leave, Mom. We can’t live someplace else. This is home. How are we supposed to get to Sunday dinners or Petey Jr.’s birthday party if we’re in another state?”

Mom hesitates and her petting gets harder. “We can’t go to his party. Or to dinners anymore. We, oh baby,  we can’t see anyone around here anymore.”

Ruth doesn’t get it. She doesn’t want to get it. But Judy must because she jumps up from the couch like someone set it on fire.

“What do you mean we can’t see anyone?”

“We’re getting new lives. A new home, new names-”

“I like my name,” Ruth says, alarmed. She’s got a pencil case with her name on it. Her name is written on the tags of all her sweaters. It’s a good name.

“I’m not changing my name,” Judy says, voice rising yet again in pitch. “What are you talking about Mom? New names? New lives? What’s going on?”

“It’s a program. Dad is going to help out the police with something and in exchange we go someplace else and have new lives.” Mom’s stroking gets faster, shakier. “We can’t see anyone again so that we’re safe. This is all to keep you two safe.”

“See anyone? What about Uncle Michael? Grandma?” Ruth feels like a pit is growing in her stomach and it’s going to swallow her up.

“What about school?” Judy shouts. “What about my friends?”

Mom’s voice is starting to break. “No, baby. No. I know it’s hard. But it’s, this is all just to keep you safe.”

Ruth stands up too, so quick that the hands still in her hair yank hard and when she turns around she sees strands of brown wrapped up in Mom’s fingers. Ruth feels like crying, from the sharp hurt and from the heavy feeling in her stomach. She slowly takes a few steps back, but Mom’s not looking at her.

Judy’s got tears streaming down her face, but her expression is angry. Angier than anything Ruth’s ever seen on her. Angier even then the time Ruth stole her favorite scarf and spilled grape juice all over it.

“You can’t do this to us!” Judy chokes on her words, arms waving erratically. “We shouldn’t be punished for what he did! He’s the one who-”

Ruth slips out of the living room, runs to her room and throws herself down on the bed. She can still hear the shouting, can hear Uncle Michael’s voice rise up to try to calm them down. She smashes her face into a pillow and cries so much she has to run to the bathroom to throw up.

-

Mrs. McGrath is a lot like Ms. Leighton. She’s always talking about the future and the second day of school, she hands out the same assignment.  Except Mrs. McGrath is bitter about it. She’s old, bag of bones kind of old, and she kind of rattles when she gets too loud and kind of wheezes when she moves too much. The future must be pretty depressing for somebody with a foot already in the grave so it’s pretty understandable that Mrs. McGarth talks about the next ten years like it isn’t going to come.

When the time comes to start on her assignment, she spends ten minutes just staring at the faces in the room she doesn’t know and only bends over her desk when Mrs. McGarth tells everyone to keep their eyes on their own paper.

She doesn’t write that she’s going to be a movie star. She doesn’t write about mansions. She doesn’t write about marriage or babies or the best friend who she’ll never see again. She writes that she doesn’t know where she’s going to be. She writes that she doesn’t know who she’s going to be. But she writes that she’ll have her sister and in ten years that will probably be enough to be okay.

She sits still, playing with the straps of her backpack until everyone else leaves the room. She’s slow to get up even then, turns in the paper without so much of a glance to the teacher. She does glance at the paper when she leaves, pressing her lips tight together. The _Heather Parker_ looks tiny, barely taking up a quarter of the space provided and written so light she can barely make out the Es.  She hunches up her shoulders and nearly runs from the room, off to the playground where Emily Parker is going to be waiting with a swing reserved and a tube of lip balm to share.


End file.
